The patron saint of gravediggers,

Is known as Anthony by name,

Yet he doubles up with the swineherders,

Does this Anthony of papal acclaim.


Then there is an unlikely patron,

Of truss makers can you believe?

Well I’ll wager a bet he was having a laugh,

Was Saint Follan whilst helping relieve,


The suffering of cooks griddled alive,

For they have a patron as well,

His name is Lawrence and quite odder still,

Are the jokes Saint Lawrence could tell,


For his extra gig are comedians,

This one I find hard to accept,

For how come he patrons the tortured,

Then has a joke, when he should really have wept?


Then we have Saint Dismus whose roll is,

To patron undertakers and thieves alike,

Personally I can’t quite see the fit,

When a miscreant’s stolen the bike,


Of the poor undertaker,

Now late for getting to a funeral,

Best call in good old Saint Michael,

The patron of the police after all.

Saint Blaise is the patron of town criers,

So I’m guessing he shouts quite a lot,

Yet Saint Hunna of washer women,

Needs to know cold water from hot!


Yet the one whose job description confuses

Me most is he of the Lottery,

For Saint Martin de Porres,

Is also patron of black people you see.


Now given the history of white money,

And the evil that was slavery,

For Martin to end up with both gigs,

Seems like double standards to me.

6 thoughts on “PATRON SAINT OF ‘COOKS GRIDDLED ALIVE’ and more…..!

  1. Nice piece of poedree there Michael. I know a fair bit about the genre to be fair. Not that it’s going to do me any good when I’m killed by fracking mind you 😦

  2. This is beautiful, just like the one you posted before this one! You’re on a roll today…I probably asked this before, but have you ever considered publishing a book with collected poems? I know that’s easier said than done, but the poetry you put out there no doubt will appeal to a lot of people!

    1. Thanks for the comment. Not sure about the book idea. If I cast a critical eye at what I do I believe I can come up with good subject matter yet quality poetry? I’m not sure. The problem with all my musings is that I play with subject matter; not dissect it as, for example, you do with panache!

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