A BLACK BAT TATTOO ON HER BUM – A true story told in verse!

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Long ago and far away,

I cannot exactly remember when,

My wife had a black bat tattooed on her bum,

And showed it me now and then.

 

The black bat took up pride of place,

Upon her most edible right cheek,

And the more that I did study it,

The more I thought it rather neat.

 

And so it was I came to like it,

The black bat on a bum quite pert,

Yet when she fell pregnant with our son,

I mentioned something that did hurt.

 

You see as is not that uncommon,

And not long before the birth,

That fact that her bum had spread a bit,

Was the thing that caused me mirth.

 

In truth the thing I said to her,

“Dear your tattoo looks more like a grey albatross,

Than the black bat that you started with,”

Was the thing that made her most cross.

 

Thankfully once her boy was born,

And after a diet most unforgiving,

The wife’s bum was restored to its usual form,

Yet if she ever reads this my life won’t be worth living.

 

 

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16 thoughts on “A BLACK BAT TATTOO ON HER BUM – A true story told in verse!

  1. “Dear your tattoo looks more like a grey albatross,”

    Diplomacy would dictate a bird more petite.

    ***

    A conversation overheard in an old folks home.

    “Gosh, why did you have a raisin tattooed on your ankle”?

    “My dear, when I was your age, it was a rose.”

    1. Like it! I think the best ever tattoo I saw was years ago on the steps of Wolverhampton County Court when a young ‘skinhead’ appeared with the ‘C’ word (expressed this way so as not to offend any lady readers) tattooed across his forehead. I often wonder how his life turned out.

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