I will remain incarcerated,
Until the day I die,
And banged up here in solitary,
I have befriended a blowfly.
I was going to call him Ernest,
After my old dad,
But since dad was an evil bastard,
I named my blowfly Chad.
After the bloke I murdered,
Tell the truth he was a good lad,
It’s just that Chad had overlooked,
The fact I’m stark raving bonkers mad.
This new Chad, Chad the blowfly,
He serves to calm me down,
Since the day that I befriended him,
I’ve yet to cast a frown.
His favourite place is the slop bucket,
He sticks to it like glue,
Yet I’m careful not to splatter him,
When I require a number two.
Just last week Chad and I,
Had a right good proper time,
I filled a saucer up with the prison gravy,
For to me it tastes like slime,
Yet my little blowfly chum,
Thought it the very best thing,
He got in such an awful mess,
I had to help him clean his wing.
So thank you little blowfly friend,
For the hours of fun you’ve given me,
Without the pleasure of your presence here,
I’d be up the proverbial gum tree.