DRUNK SO MUCH I WAS OFF MY FACE – A ‘silly’ verse!

 

At first I had heard she was living back in Paris,

Yet a little later I lost track of her,

Then one day I received an urgent message,

That she was at death’s door in Hanover.

 

At the start she said, ‘Do not ever fall in love with me,’

I answered, ‘Yes,’ yet that was but a lie,

For already I had become besotted,

If I could not win her heart then I would surely die.

 

They say time heals a lost devotion,

Yet in truth I never found that so,

Each day of the decade since she departed,

Each day brought with it a new low.

 

Regardless, at the news of her grave affliction,

Across the Channel onto Germany I rushed,

I found her at her lodgings in Hanover,

And arrived more than a little flushed.

 

Even so very ill she still retained great beauty,

Lying under swathes of blankets upon her bed,

I leaned forward and gently kissed her gelid brow,

And by way of riposte this is what she said.

 

“How on earth have you discovered me?

I really thought I had lost you; you twat for good,

For you to see me thus causes me annoyance,

So bugger off back to England – understood?”

 

Tail between my legs I took of my leave,

For she had clearly put me in my place,

So I found a little bar off Luisenstrasse,

And drunk so much that I was off my face.

 

In the morning I was told she had passed away,

Only an hour after I had left the previous night,

She had however penned me a short note,

That read, ‘You always were a bore and none too bright!’

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