BATMAN & SEAGULL – The Days before ‘Robin’


Before Batman met up with Robin,

His previous ward went by the name,

Of none other than the Seagull,

And Seagull was a pain,


For when compared to Robin,

A sweet and gentle lad,

Seagull was quite brash and bold,

And like his namesake was mostly bad.


He would when in the Bat Mobile,

Driving about Gotham City,

Wolf whistle at all the ladies,

Whether or not they were pretty,


Ever the incorrigible,

Loud mouthed useless pain,

He really pissed off Batman,

In disguise, or as Bruce Wayne


As for the butler Alfred,

Seagull took a grave dislike,

Even telling Alfred once,

To get on his fucking bike


Also when the villains,

Such as The Joker and Mr Freeze,

Were being, well just miscreants,

Seagull let them do as they please


The final straw came on the day,

Seagull took things too far,

He did what seagulls always do,

And shat on Batman’s car.


And thus it got too much for,

Batman who had become most bored,

With putting up with Seagull’s ways,

And so he chose another ward.


The new one would Batman determined,

Be named again after our feathered friends,

Thus Robin came into being,

And there this story ends,


Save for this short postscript,

For the tale must be told,

Henceforth Seagull dressed as The Penguin,

And joined the scallion’s fold.


11 thoughts on “BATMAN & SEAGULL – The Days before ‘Robin’

    1. You see that’s where you’ll always beat me – the blending of words together. They end up most profound, philosophical, touch on ethics and development of being (in just 7 words). If you’d like my right arm I’d gladly trade it for your abilities! Cheers.

  1. That was very funny…did not see the ending coming! Great take on the Batman franchise…it was deserving of a silly tale like this, as the recent movies take themselves way too seriously;)

  2. You’re off me list for being too full-on and disgusting. I love the smudge though. Have the artist scrubbed and sent to my tent for light book illustrating duties!

  3. Oh, the plot twist! Plus, this explains how The Penguin knew the plans to the Batmobile and was able to hack into its system in the film BATMAN RETURNS. You’ve solved a film loop-hole mystery that’s 25 years old, Sir!

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