“I’ll never get the knack of this,
Can’t get my breathing right,
This living out of water thing,
I’ll not evolve tonight.
I’ve been trying to evolve you see,
It’s been weeks I’m in a hurry,
But all my mates within the school,
Say, ‘Take your time Ed do not worry.’
The thing is I am quite fed up,
Living this fishy life,
I want to grow some arms and legs,
And find myself a wife.
You see where I come from,
Down here in the sea,
The girl fish are all identical,
And that’s no use to me.
I met a fish called Ada,
I thought that she looked quite game,
I looked for her the next day,
But the girls all look the same.
And so I lost my Ada,
Not that I care that much,
‘Cause once I have evolved a bit,
I’ll get to feel and touch.
I saw a mermaid once you know,
She was quite a dish,
Well her top half it were lovely,
But from her bum down she was fish.
I think I saw the girl I want,
Sunbathing on a yacht,
She wasn’t wearing very much,
But mind you it was most hot.
I want to marry that girl,
When I’ve evolved some more,
If I choose the right time,
She’ll not show me the door.
So that’s why I’m in a hurry,
I must evolve today,
Oh no, I’m in despair now,
Her yacht just sailed away!”