“I say Carruthers good news regarding the missus I understand?” 

“Yes old chap I really think she’s on the mend at last. Even smartened herself up and walks about the place giggling like a schoolgirl at play. A joy to behold I can tell you after all I’ve been through.” 

“Was she cured by a physician?” 

“No, she just seemed to snap out of it. Odd if you think about it. You see she has always had a love for tennis – bleddy fine player in her day – so she took it upon herself to rekindle her old passion for the game and started coaching beginners. Handy really for we have both hard and grass courts at home. Good to see them getting some use at last.  Anyway it seems to have been the making of her.” 

“How so?” 

“Well this young tall, some would say handsome Italian chappie turned up out of the blue wanting tennis lessons and the pair of them are at it for hours on end.  Only this weekend I was ensconced in the Sunday Times sat in my deckchair – glorious day mind – the other side of the hedgerow from the courts. They had no idea I was there by the way and I overheard her issuing enthusiastic coaching instructions to the boy.” 


“Yes, I had to chuckle to myself as she told him to keep his balls in no less!  Furthermore she went on to add if they were going to play doubles later he should remember to drive it up the middle when her back was toward him and that if he did not she would have to forehand his shaft.  Even called him a ‘naughty boy.’ Almost spit my afternoon snifter out when she innocently came out with that I can say.” 

“Jolly good to hear. I’m glad for you both.” 

“She certainly must be on a fitness regimes for I also eavesdropped her telling him that, ‘We must have the endurance to do it for up to 3 hours – straight’ and ‘I hope you don’t mind if I grunt when the action heats up.’ The boy’s riposte was to say that he was more than happy for her to make a racket any time the sweet spot was struck.” 

“What fun the pair must have had – good on them.” 

“Yes, toward the end of the coaching session she added, ‘To a tennis player love means nothing until you’ve scored.’ How very informative I thought to myself.  Anyway, the club beckons. You up for one?”

“Is the PM an Eton boy I am.”  



    1. All in the mind – poor old Deirdre is on the mend at least, what with her Tourettes and the incident with the horse things were pretty sad for the poor girl for awhile. I am glad you like our stuff though – many thanks.

    1. I can certainly see Mr Bean there yet he himself was a British stereotype. The thing is us Brits seem to stumble forward whereas to an American, if something is possible to move forward fully focused. Cheers.

    1. Thank you Sir – odd fact for in the UK Mothers Day is in March! When I turned the PC on today I thought I was in a time warp as Mother’s Day tributes were everywhere! A good thing – just that we are out of kilter with the rest of the world it seems!

  1. Sorry but I can’t put a name on the woman’s face playing tennis…
    She must be a hell of a tennis player playing with these kind of shoes!

    1. Deidre is branching out after several recent trauma’s – what with her husband Carruthers being such a twat! One hell of a cleavage though – yet with your French heritage I feel sure you spotted that well before me!

    1. Cheers Sir. By the way circumstance have not let me listen properly to your new single yet (boring things I shan’t bother you with). I have clicked ‘like’ thus far because I know I will like. I will be on the case in the AM Sir.

      1. Much appreciated, Mike. Hope you enjoy it. The video as much fun to do as was writing the song. 🙂

      1. I’m glad Mrs. Deirdre recovered from her previous accident. If she didn’t end up with the tennis instructor, I was afraid she might turn to the male nurse for some relief of her frustration.

  2. Now that I’ve picked myself up off the floor where I landed after sliding out of my chair boneless with laughter I have to say – ‘jolly good show – what.’

    1. Nice to see Deirdre getting herself together after her recent trauma’s. I am, by the way disappearing for a few days later this week but will endeavour to read the blogs I follow on my tablet – just won’t be posting. Can’t post on a tablet because the touch screen keeps changing everything I write!

  3. “To a tennis player love means nothing until you’ve scored.” Great line to a great story! Deirdre really has my sympathy and I do hope she’s enjoying the game as much as it would seem she does.
    These Carruthers posts are great, Mike…the plot thickens with each and every one in a very delightfully silly, yet never over-the-top kind of way. If you ever sell the movie rights, let’s hope you’re selling it to the guys from Monty Python!

      1. Wow, you are most generous. Well, in that case: SHOTGUN!
        Thanks, Mike…this line will no doubt appear on my blog someday (I have an entire document filled with punchlines and ideas I’ve never been able to use but that I want to use whenever it ‘fits’ the subject. This makes a fine addition!

  4. As someone who hasn’t yet met Dierdre (a gross oversight on my part – and my part intends rectifying the matter forthwith)…. I was going to offer the following alternative caption….

    The medical bods are wonderful today aren’t they? Looks like the operation was a resounding success and I hope George will be very happy with the outcome. Sad to see him leave our circle of friends though… No more ‘drinks on me’ jokes I’m afraid.

    1. Sorry for the inexcusable delay in replying – bad form and all that yet I have been in France for a few days and the wife put a ban on blogging! As ever your caption is better than my original yet the Carruthers franchise will live on! Cheers.

      1. No apologies necessary – I trust you and your fairer half enjoyed your sojourn on t’other side of t’channel. Thank you muchly for your kind sentiments re the caption, but we are profoundly grateful to hear that we will hear more of dear Dierdre, as she appears, in her photograph, to have a very fine future ahead of her.

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