Your tiny hand is frozen

Your nose is dripping too

From the look of it you’ll throw up soon

It could be the death of you


As you lie there in the your sick bed

Bereft and chucking up a bit

Your clothes insufficient for such cold conditions

And I see you’ve now thrown a fit


From your brow I detect a temperature

Upon which one could fry an egg

And yes, now I have just spotted

You’ve got only the one leg


All in all you’re a basket case

In need of compassion and nursing care

Were I a priest the chances are

I’d offer up a prayer


And trust the Lord would take charge

Maybe grant you a wish or two

Yet as it happens even I, a thief by trade

Have no intention of staying close to you


So sorry pal I’m off now

You’ll note at a great pace

For I wouldn’t touch you with a barge pole with a boxing glove on the end

You know…just in case!


Verse by Anita Degenerate © 2014

What the critics said:

“Vicious cow…that Anita should be horsewhipped for this!” – Archbishop of Canterbury 

“Hope the author of this vile verse dies of the clap” – Russell Brand

“Plainly the bitch cares not for the human race.” – Gladys Knight

“Bloody things get stuck in your teeth.” – Gladys Knight

“Fuck off.” – The Pips

“Not a bad first stab (oops shouldn’t have said ‘stab’) yet could have gone a little deeper in the mind-set of the thief…bit more action too, perhaps a swift disembowelment?” – Jack the Ripper


18 thoughts on “YOUR NOSE IS DRIPPING TOO!

  1. You know, I really wasn’t going to comment but when I saw that I would be in the proud company of Gladys Knight AND the Pips, well, how could I resist. I’ll go with Jack the Ripper on this one!

      1. I very nearly had one of my confused moments there young Marissa! Especially so as I was penning a ribald Arthurian tale of double entendre for a future post when I walked right into one what you just wrote!

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