A LATIN MASS & A FISH AND CHIP SUPPER

glasses geek chic fashion pink cute photography

To have spent a small fortune

only to catch a distant glimpse

of an orca whale’s fin off the coast

of Reykjavik was a major disappointment

 

Bothersome that his eco tourist travelling

companions thought it the finest thing

the gals all squealing with delight

the chaps to a man yelping as if their

team had scored the winning goal

 

Fervour sadly was a thing he

singularly lacked, always had for

long since he had discovered

that endings and manifestations

are never the anticipated dull ache

always a breath extinguishing

punch in the solar plexus

 

He lived alone

 

Back in Blighty birthday boy merely

wanted a single lit candle upon

his slice of Victoria Sponge cake

 

“Sorry we ain’t got no candles”

so said the small yet perfectly

formed chirpy waitress

a gal on the face of it as

common as muck yet whose

bespectacled eyes imparted a spark

told him the ‘lights were on’

 

“You that professor bloke who lives up the road?”

 

“I can confirm that I am he.”

 

“Seeing as how I ain’t got a candle for yer would a birthday kiss do instead?”

 

“I hardly know you!”

 

In that very instant a thought

‘pray God not the Pygmalion game’

as she planted a beguiling smacker

upon his hesitant lips

 

“There…better than a candle don’t you think?”

 

“Much better…thank you”

 

He left her a generous tip

 

Somewhere down the line against all odds

a Latin Mass and a fish & chip supper later

he married his sweet café hostess

 

However, whereas she evolved he diminished

She, a zealous girl who would lie back and think

of much more than just the possibilities

He, an apt diffident afraid of his own shadow

 

The day she ran away his imaginings ran rampant

Was she showing WG Grace how to fashion a cover drive?

Had drunk Hemingway under the table?

Proven herself too dexterous, too ‘energetic’ for Errol Flynn?

All sorts of everything

 

The house now an empty shell

sat in the old conservatory he

watches a wayward sparrow

crashing into pane now in pain

stunned itself, dropped like a

wannabe champion to the deck

gives itself a little shake, no longer

befuddled, goes about its business

embarrassed yet none the worse

for the encounter

 

Down the pub his best mate says

It’s dog eat dog under the sea mate…and that’s the truth”

He puzzled over that for an eternity

 

Save for a china jaw and a propensity

to bruise too easily he could have been

champion of the world, could have

won her heart and soul for keeps

 

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33 thoughts on “A LATIN MASS & A FISH AND CHIP SUPPER

    • Ah Mr Bean! I have a love/hate thing with that character…so brilliantly typically British yet Mr Atkinson in this role sometimes cannot let go of a good scene/bit of scripting…then again I’m guilty of that and I just write for the fun of it.

    • You mentioned on another post re how much of the post is about me! This one is part me; part events I heard/watched during this week and part my youngest son who in character is a mirror of me. The outgoing waitress with the glasses who as all over him like a rash when he and I popped out for a coffee and a bit of cake on his birthday is real…driving back I mentioned she fancied him something rotten. His riposte ‘who?’ I do wish he took after his wild mother mother not me!

    • I do miss fish a little – fish and chips is good when both are cooked to perfection. Some places still manage that and the smell from the fish and chip shops at the seaside especially is sublime!

      • If you remember a TV show from the 60s called Family Affair, and it had your Sebastian Cabot as the gentleman’s gentleman…one episode featured the family in Europe and they got fish & chips in these rolled paper cones…. it looked SO delicious, and so quaint served that way! Damn, now I want fish again!

      • Just strolled about the old harbour in Folkestone. Never been there before and the smell of fresh fish and chips was tempting. Forgot the bloody camera though for the architecture was like going back in time! Glad we found it – just 15 minutes up the road!

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