FEASTIVE BLOGGING BREAK

rejecting-man-bar

As ever at this time of the year, I shall escape under the radar for a short while, drink a little too much festive fine wine, scoff my delicious smelly French cheeses, read a book or two and probably count my brain cells (a bad habit, I know). Armed with just a tablet I no doubt will pop into WP every so often for a swift read.

However, I cannot take of my ‘bleak mid-winter’ leave before wishing every last one of you good souls, whatever your code or creed, the very best of good fortune.

Lastly, as some of you already know I have a passion for street cafes serving exquisite coffee (never a franchise as their cups are more like fire buckets for gluttons rather than respectable, small vessels that enhance the bean). Yes, ‘my passion’ is watching the world go by, and even in these freezing days of winter I still venture out and about. Generally, ‘people watching’ serves up ideas to write about. Earlier this week I observed in the street a hopeless, dishevelled young man attempting to chat up a sweet gal who plainly, and almost politely, had no desire for him…or indeed, to be seen with him. As she dismissed his very presence and walked away he looked bemused, hence the silly verse that follows;

‘I’D PICK YOU FIRST’

All of the gals in the village

thought him the most consummate twat

finally, he got the message

went and stayed indoors with his cat

 

that his cat went walkabout came as no surprise

and the boys down the pub they heard tell

that not only was he now a cat-less twat

but by Christ did he chuck-up as well

 

plainly he’d overlooked an important thing

that when pestering sweet gals for a date

it’s best to first avail oneself of a shower

thus, one’s hygiene habits are never open to debate

 

moreover, he that should have been aware

that his chat up lines were generally cursed

especially so his most favoured one

‘If you were a bogey, I’d pick you first’

 

Have the most splendid time!

 

 

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84 thoughts on “FEASTIVE BLOGGING BREAK

    1. Terrible isn’t it! I ‘picked’ that particular line up listening to two young lads outside the café the other day just prior to seeing the twat chat up the gal. Silly I know, but I had to use it somewhere. You and yours have a politics free Christmas and forget the rest of the planet…even though it’s only for a couple of days. Enjoy.

    1. Paul, I know your coast of the US is sending us rather unpleasant weather later this week and I forgive. I shall extract one of your books from the bookcase once more and savour the poetry with more than a glass of vino at hand. You and yours have the finest Christmas. A diamond geezer you are!

    1. And the same back. With my tablet thing, if I can remember what to do with it and if you are still posting sublime poetry (’tis always sublime), rest assured I shall find you. Truly, have a Christmas like no other.

  1. Such a visual post, my friend. I was with you every step of the way. It’s worthy of a re-blog for others to enjoy.

    Watching people is a great way to spend an hour or so.

    Enjoy the holidays. I shall await your return.

    1. Thanks for that, Scott. You and yours have the finest time. Cafe’s are both my pleasure and my downfall…French ones especially. We live so close to France, living here in Dover, that we can travel across as fancy takes…the day after Boxing Day is looking good for a trip. Happy Christmas.

      1. Glass or red sounds like a good idea. Hope your festive season is going well! I actually put writing aside for a couple of days and now new ideas will hopefully spring up. Hope you enjoyed your festivities, and have a happy new year to come!

  2. Kind of reminds me of Ezra Pound but with snot…Happy Christmas!

    From Ezra:
    Four and forty lovers had Agathas in the old days,
    All of whom she refused;

    And now she turns to me seeking love,
    And her hair also is turning.

  3. Ha! Thank you so much for the smile today, Mike–I needed this.
    And what’s wrong with my fire buckets?!?! (Well to be honest I’ll take a petrol station’s coffee over Starbucks any day. RIDICULOUSLY overrate. Small roasts, though, are lovely. There are two Wisconsin roasters I love very dearly–maybe next year I can send you a sampler 🙂

    1. Starbucks are the very worst. Vile liquid they claim as coffee! Still, done all my writing and am now bored. Spent the week writing more words than you could shake a stick at! Christmas Eve and still sticking to my ‘no alcohol before 7pm’ rule. How about you?

      1. Christmas Eve: my Christmas punch was a bust, but the church survived us, and Bo made a fine dinner. Christmas Day with the in-laws was….um…well quite a bore, really, but we managed to enjoy ourselves again when we got home. 🙂 I think I can finally start writing fiction and stuff again now that the shock of the month has finally faded.
        Of course, I have to deal with certain family members New Years Day…ugh to that.

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  5. Happy Christmas to you guys, and a wonderful New Year! 🙂 Enjoy your break, Mike, enjoy life as described – French cheese and all. Thank you for putting a smile on my face with this poem – probably the first smile this December ❤

      1. It is truly good that you’re back…even if it is only for now and then, when you feel up to it. It may sound odd, but certain people (selfish of me, I know), and you are no. 1 in the list inspire me to carry on writing.

      2. Aww, you’re so sweet! In fact, a visit to you guys is at the top of my bucket list. And after that, climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro. Then Hawaii. But you’re first! Right now, I’m trying to get my symptoms under control and save for a new house, and expect to have traveling money later this year. 🙂

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