Photograph by Natalie Shau
‘We are our choices’ – Jean-Paul Sartre
Hellish hard to determine what, if any, section of a new book one should impart in an attempt to expose it’s blanket disposition when I am naught but a fanciful old fool and my co-author is currently glued to her weeding and seeding only taking short breaks to talk of family planning with the frantic copulating insects of all shapes and sizes who have set about constructing makeshift bordellos in her otherwise virginal yet rustic garden. Thus it calls for an executive decision of the sort I’ve never been good at. Best we start at the very beginning? Why not;
CHAPTER ONE EXTRACT
‘WHATEVER HAPPENED TO EVE?’
Shirley Blamey & Michael Steeden
“No one can hear you cry when the swifts scream overhead,” pertinent words pitched at the penitent yet unforgiven wailing dreadlocked martyr to a lost cause, aptly pinned to an immense wooden cross in the centre-ville of a yesteryears garden of delights, a place of incongruous juxtapositions where both the lascivious and the meek come out to play.
Her victims fate sealed, she would leave the wretched sufferer to stew in his own juices, yet not before posing of him the inconsequential question, “I am very dark, but comely don’t you think?” previous to making a dramatic show of relieving him of, “This futile, ridiculous loincloth,” and tossing it into the baying crowd, adding for good measure, “There now, you must agree that there is no point in a public crucifixion without a modicum of sexual humiliation Romanesque style? Look see, your devotees are ecstatic and slobbering for more at long last.” With that, she, displaying her celebrated savoir-faire exited the podium, and made to leave the playground to the unenlightened rabble, now feasting their bellies upon ripe giant strawberries and clotted cream, their eyes firmly fixed upon the helpless, evermore humbled one, his relentless blubbering, sweetest music to their ears. Then unexpectedly and clearly in deepest thought she paused, turned about face, adopting a clichéd quizzical pose, head tilted to one side, eyes glued upon her quarry’s uncovered groin. Taking precise, even steps, she unhurriedly returned to the hapless fellow nailed to the crucifix. “You know… well plainly you couldn’t know…my beloved red-tailed hawk, ‘Missy’ by name, hasn’t feasted upon manhood’s trinity of culinary delights for what seems like an age. She always saves the cock ‘til last, I thought you’d like to know. Anyhow, it’s always been her favourite nibble…nice and chewy. I’m minded to treat her to those tasty morsels of yours. Such a yummy delicacy for her to savour…full of zinc and protein as well…I do hope you don’t mind. I’d wipe away your tears if only I had a handkerchief, whatever, let us see if the mob below agree with me, shall we?” Indeed, the mob were as one in imparting rapturous applause, thus expressing their raucous, drooling approval at the prospect of seeing Missy dining out.
Within the hour, under an inferno sun, a female hawk in flight, wings spread wide, gliding majestically, circling provocatively, casting her waltzing shadow over the crowd below as she readied herself for a much longed for bite to gobble up.
If proof was ever needed then the above is a case in point for never, never ever underestimate the intellect or determination of the female of the species. Especially so when the female concerned is both contrarily everlasting and also the sadistic Empress of an otherworldly dominion, a place where everything imaginable is probable.
Such a wonderful woman in my opinion was the dark Empress of all she hankered after. Loved and hated in equal measure…although I will come to her dubious role in the tale I have to tell a little later… for as of now I need to scroll back in time. Back to where it all resumed, ‘resumed’ being the operative word as will become clear. Back to when The Empress’ polar opposite, a girl called Eve, yes, that ‘Eve’, the one of apple scoffing fame, was ready, willing and at long last able to fledge……
For what it may, or may not be worth, the book is available on Amazon generally and below, the links to the paperback and Kindle edition in both the Amazon UK and the Amazon US (simply because these are the only links I’ve discovered).