An embarrassing tale!
Above, the one-eyed girl before the accident. Artist unknown. The one-eyed girl of almost fatal disasters had spent the entire morning wondering why blokes…for the main part…prefer revolvers and rifles over the humble hand-grenade. By lunchtime, she’d given up pondering, saying to herself, “What do I know,” for the time had come for scoffing yesterday’s … More HARRY AND HIS GIRLS
Above, dear Hélène at work Amélie was a good sortat least I thought so until that daythe old cow locked me in the cellarof her Parisian bordello and threw the key away My crime? I didn’t cough upthe fee after the eventa caddish trick I realize nowyet my francs I’d long since spent spent them … More SHE LOCKED ME IN THE CELLAR!
Back home in the County of Kent young Rosie the loveable monster girl had to face her boyfriend, a pleasant dog none too bright going by the handle ‘Toby the Muscular Mongrel’. The pair had always made a fine couple spending much of their time in the fields and forests together running hither and yon. … More ROSIE & THE CHAMPION OF THE WORLD
MAURICE COLLARUPPRIVATE INVESTIGATOR & PROCESS SERVERBACKLIT HOUSESHADOW LANESOHOLONDON Dearest Fanny, I think of you often. Even now with the passage of time your image stays with me…as fresh as a daisy in springtime. Do you remember when we took that camel train across The Sahara desert? Week upon week without shadow; the harsh unforgiving midday … More FANNY, I THINK OF YOU OFTEN
I’ve mentioned bonkers but lovely Rosie, the now 7 month old, ever bouncing puppy in this blog previously. What I hadn’t been aware of was her consummate piano skills…a virtuoso if there ever was one…until she’d paid a visit to my musician son’s…George by name…domain. Herewith, a video revealing Miss Rosie tickling the ivories, an … More MISS ROSIE, THE VIRTUOSO
“Well you know what they say Lenny boy, ‘There’s no such thing as a silent plumbing system,’ yet yours was banging away like a Soho brothel on a Saturday night if I may say so. I’m surprised you could get any bo-peep. Still, it’s all sorted now I’ve installed a handy anti-siphon trap.” “Yeah I … More JONNY CATAPAULT – THE PLUMBER THE ARTISTS ALL TRUST & LEONARDO DA VINCI’S BANGING WATER PIPES
Judea AD28. JC has been out and about all morning and has now returned home for a spot of lunch only to find Mary sat down in her favourite chair playing with her iPad thing exactly as he left her earlier. The look upon his face reveals that JC is not happy about this in … More ON HOW MARY HAS MORE ‘FOLLOWERS’ ON FACEBOOK THAN JC
‘An Unusual Take on Life and Social History from the 1950’s Onward‘ In a perfect world I’d have been rich and famous thus deemed worthy of penning the story of my own life. In reality I am a content ‘nowhere man’ with a vast chronicle of all things bonkers to pass on to anyone who … More AN ‘ONLY CHILD’ & HIS MUM’S AMAZING GERM PHOBIA
A GONDOLIER, A STARLIT NIGHT Conjure me a social leperConjure me an ice cold beerConjure me a starlit nightAnd perhaps a romantic gondolier Venice, it was VeniceWhere my sanity was lostFell in love with an actressWith a heart as cold as frost Blanche the name she went bySo sweet when I had moneySo cruel when … More A GONDOLIER; A STARLIT NIGHT
A BUNDLE OF TRUE LOVERS You always walked the high wire, without a safety netyou were both brave and foolish, yet now I’m cursed never to forgetthat day you turned on a sixpence, that awful day you let me straythen stole a pistol from your father’s study and blew your brains away The day they … More A BUNDLE OF TRUE LOVERS
- MIKE STEEDEN - 